The Wonderful Horrible Mind of Nick Frink

Colin’s been one of the assistant managers at my job, and the guy who had the skills to be manager, but unlike our boss, he sees where we’re coming from and has empathy. Not only that, but he’s always been a really cool dude to everyone, and it doesn’t hurt that he was really into Skyrim. Sure, he might have been in his mid or late 30’s, but he was a cool dude, and the best boss that I had to deal with at work and everyone was hoping he would eventually turn into manager soon…

Last night, Collin passed away from a heart attack. I literally found this out like ten minutes ago. He wasn’t old, he wasn’t obesse or looked like anyone i would jave expected to have a heart attack. I remember our last conversation was wishing each other a good weekend and that we would see each other next time I worked. My co-worker, Chris, said they talked about Diablo 3 just less than 15 hours ago. Nobody saw this coming.

And as the first person to sie that I actually had a connection with, two things popped into my head:

Why dont I feel more sad? I want to say its because I’m in shock and it hasn’t really hit me yet. Maybe I’ll bawl when I see his empty desk at work. But what worries me is: what if i don’t? What if I’m some kinda heartless monster who only gets sad when he sees others sad. I can’t picture never seeing, or talking, or joking with Collin again without coming up with a weak-ass, “well that really sucks.” Try as i might, there’s no more sadness than that…

The second thought is that after having a scooter kid from this skatepark pass earlier this month, and now my boss, I can’t help but feel like death is snaking its way towardss me. Like the world is playing duck-duck-goose, but there’s no chasing around in this game; just death. I’ve had close calls, moments where death has pat my head and paused before slowly saying “duck” ans moving on. But when he decides its my turn… How old (or young) am i going to be? And will i expect it at all? Some people get a hint in advance. terminal illness or injury, going into battle, or even seeing an oncoming car with no time to move… You have even the slightest recognitions that you will pass soon, and you can brace yourself for that, even if its just a millisecond.

Like i’ve said before, death doesn’t seem to give a shit about who his victims are. And i know I’m going to really miss Collin, and our nerdy game conversations on slow days. I’m going to miss that look he gave after I messed up or was in a jam that said, “just cuz our boss doesn’t understand your dilemma doesn’t mean I don’t”. It sucks because we definitely could have gotten to know each other better, to have spoken more and stuff. But we thought we had more time.

That’s always the problem though, isn’t it? We always think we have more time…

This song has been the curse that has resurrected the ghosts thag haunt me today, especially since its loosely based on old feelings I thought i claimed dead.

#whenwillyougetoutofmyhead

That moment where you don’t have a fucking clue to what you want, neither short nor long term, other than not being alone like that very instant

gurl imma have to call you back

(Source: hunkdujour.com, via myfilthypout)

waylan:

:|

(Source: lewlewlew, via myfilthypout)

bazinngaa:

literally this ^

(Source: saturninesatisfaction, via bandolin21)

The perfect metaphor on my side of the story of 2011. You can listen to the whole song if you want, but it starts at 3 minutes in. I don’t think the metaphor is TOO VAGUE. and also the reason I will never apologize for what I say in my raps as well.

You have no idea how hyped I’d be if thid happened to me

(via scrst)

Read more

(Source: lifeispureimagination, via scrst)

(via flirtingwiththeinevitable)

Notes:

• I am tall, lanky and happen to be nerdy and desire to gain money to have those kinds of clothes before seeing the article.
• All the NBA stars are tall, lanky black guys who are into the nerdy look because they’re, too, truly nerdy.
• Childish Gambino/Donald Glover is tall, lanky and a black nerd and HAS BEEN dressing like that.

Conclusion:

If  your black, tall, and lanky, you’re more than likely going to be a nerdy “Oreo”.

Thank you Time Magazine.

Thank you science

To The Cookie, I wonder how this all turned into Monster Shit/

You’ve always had my respect, we can squash the beef like sausages.